Missing You

It has been 18 months since I last held you in my arms. I still think about you everyday. This Sunday would have been your first week in nursery at church. I wonder how you would have handled it. Would you have been so excited to play with other kids, like Cambria was, or would you have clung to my leg and not let me leave like Cobie did? Somehow I think you would have each found your own way to make the day a memorable one. I am so excited for you little brother to get here, and I know you are taking good care of him, but I still miss you two terribly. I have been trying to think of how Jesus would handle losing a child. I know when He lost His best friend John the Baptist, He forgot himself and immediately went to work preaching His Father's gospel. But I can't help but think that this is different. I think of when Christ was crucified, and God the Father watched His Son die. The earth shook, mountains crumbled, rocks broke. I think that is closer to the pain I feel. Nothing will ever replace you in my heart. I am learning to be happy again, but the pieces of my heart will never be completely healed until I see you again. I love you.